Schoolmates

At a recent funeral in my hometown I saw some old schoolmates, some of whom I hadn't seen in decades. It was fun, but none of us made any effort to stay in touch. We'll see each other, or not, at the next funeral, and that will be the end of it.

That's not to say none of us ever stay in touch with any of our schoolmates; the point is that it's not at all unusual when we don't.

But Asia is different. Schoolmates have lifelong commitments to each other, and tend to see one another often, and take care of each other.

My most recent example took place in Korea, but I've seen similar in Japan too. I was at a industry event with a Korean business partner only to have a number of his school chums stop by to say hi. Some of them seemed to accept me immediately as a part of the gang, since I was a friend of their friend.

They told me stories of their joint activities -- getting together for dinner, joint business activities, etc. My partner, on this occasion and others, has told me about how they use their network of school friends to help each other in business. I even witnessed it first hand when I stayed at a hotel where one of his schoolmates was a high-ranking manager. My partner notified his schoolmate, in this case one he wasn't in quite as close touch with, and a bottle of wine and fruit basket was sent to my room. (I appreciated the gesture, but don't use wine or most fruits, so shared the items with others.)

One of my partner's friends told me it's easier for them to do this in a smaller country like Korea than it would be for us to do in the US. His point is well taken, but there's also a beautiful cultural element there that we probably lack, even if our country were smaller.